Kindnessgirl

She folded her hands like she usually does when something is about to happen. It comes quietly and with a gentle strength…”I think this is going to be holy…” she said. And it is, for these women know just how to call it, in the quiet, in the chaos, in the dark, in hope, in despair, in truth, in mystery, in fear, in strength, in weakness, in power, in love, in kindness…they just know.

Just hours earlier I had called teary, overwhelmed and exhausted, so engrossed in myself completely forgetting it was her birthday. I could barely get over my own assholery. “Please come over for birthday breakfast, please come.” she said after a pathetic apology text. Almost all of my ashamed self was shouting loudly to stay home, totally horrified by my behavior but I went because I would pretty much cut off my right arm for her. So I went and we chatted and she pulled out a tiny flowering tea ball. Before I knew it my other dear friend brought Aunt Mary Lou’s lace and sparkling candle holders, we arranged her fresh roses and daisies and just like that, the birthday altar unfolded before our eyes.

We watched as the boiling water opened the flower slowly. “You just have to add water, it’s all we really have to do…” We reminisced of just the year before when everything was so dark and hard, we talked of the journey of walking out together, sometimes carrying each other, and I wondered how I was even standing in this moment. Beside these women. The people who know the darkest parts of me and yet love all of it, the women who can hold so much, such wisdom and grace, and more intuition than even I can imagine.

We wrote our blessings…”Write one for yourself too…” she said…and I did. We lit the old candle that has burned many a flame for all our hearts have held, we sipped our tea and read our blessings to her…it will be so. Amen. …and we scooped up babies and scurried to pick up children from preschool. The beauty of the sacred unfolding, living our lives together, offering the greatest blessing we have…each other.

you can see more pics from the birthday blessing here.