the brightest light…

December 19, 2012

brightest light

I am watching Kindness go viral right before my eyes. It seems like the only response to bring honor to those lost and return hope to the world.

Thank you Ann Curry for using your power to call it in in such a profound way.

May we meet the darkest dark with the brightest light.

Much love to you all…

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sandy hook love

…it’s one of those times I don’t know what to do. I just keep looking at my own seven year old with her deep brown eyes and soulful heart… and wondering how I am going to send her off to school tomorrow. I know logically she will be fine but I can’t shake the feeling of a safety gone or being undone at the core.

…and there are no words.

…and we draw closer and hold tighter to those we love.

…and we wonder and wish there was something we could do. anything. ..because the sadness is so deep and the whole world is grieving.

stella art

In the end, we just have each other, our love, our sadness and kindness. Lots of you in the Kindnessgirl community have reached out and wanted to come together in some way. I wasn’t sure I had it in me to plan anything, nothing feels like enough, and I just wanted to hold my kids on the couch and watch movies, read books. Then I realized I could lean into you all and your ideas…that our love could be simple and quiet… that even in our grief, we are in this together.

So here are a few ideas from our community, you will know the one meant for you:

1. If you are looking for something to do with kids and other family members for the Sandy Hook Elementary School Community, please send notes of love to
Sandy Hook Elementary School
12 Dickenson Drive
Sandy Hook, CT 06482

If you are wondering how to talk to your kids about the tragedy, my dear friend Ann Reavey (a school guidance counselor) has a wonderful post full of resources here.

This is also a great article for helping the victims and info on what organizations are doing what.

I made 2 cover photos for Facebook inviting folks to share in sending their notes of love to the Sandy Hook community that you are welcome to use and pass on. They are here and here.

2. On Monday night, light a candle or leave a candle with a blue or colored bulb in your front window  in love for all those lost and the people that loved them so deeply. This can be a sign of our solidarity and support. You can send a picture of your candle or your family with a light to our Guerrilla Goodness Facebook page.

3. Do one act of kindness for a child today in honor of those little boys and girls lost, and the teachers that protected and loved them…you can share your act or ideas in the comments.

3. Just wondering how everyone is feeling today….sometimes just sharing our stories draws us closer together and makes us feel less alone.  Please feel free to use this as your community space to grieve and share whatever your heart is holding. The comment section is your seat at the circle today.

sandy hook love2

May kindness and love lead us now…may we hold tight to each other.

some mother somewhere…

December 14, 2012

re-posting this from April 2007. Feeling so heavy and deeply sad for the families of the Sandy Hook Elementary School tragedy…I found this piece I wrote after the Virginia Tech Massacre years ago. Sending so much love to every mother that grieves tonight…as we hold our own babies a little tighter.

DSC_7182-2243366554-O

updated on 12/14/12 to add photo by Tisha McCuiston – Josiah today at 12 years of age

I held a boy almost too big for my arms this morning. Josiah buried his face in my chest and let out a long cry. I assured him it’s good to cry, that feelings like to be free. The ones that are bottled up hate it and find other ways to sneak out.

Today the tears are a result of being scared, afraid that he’ll never remember the 7 facts about squid. It’s been all about squid here- squid art, squid books, even pin-the-tentacle on the squid game. This is just too much for a 7 year old, a 30 minute presentation pretending to be the teacher. The burden weighs on josiah’s mind and heart.
I suggest squid power pancakes as they are magic. If you eat them you will remember all that you need to know about squid and be able to tell anyone and everyone about their amazingness. I kiss these tears and an agreement is made that it is indeed time for the power pancakes can bring.

My puffy eyed boy runs to take a bath and I start my day of 1 million tasks.
I have a hard time focusing. I imagine there is some other mother somewhere not far from me that is starting her day. Only this mother is wishing that yesterday was simply a nightmare and surely her sweet boy is anxious about a presentation he must make for his professor. Instead she attends convocations, picks out a casket, in shock and numb. How will she face today without that boy, how can he be gone?

Even further away yet another mother faces a deeper dark. Her son’s pain and action changed people’s lives forever. The weight is too great for anyone to bear and I can not pretend to know what will keep her soul from drowning.

I can only imagine that these women wish today was the day they were holding little boys almost too big for their arms. The day where pancakes heal the aches of the soul, the day where fears can be conquered with kisses and tears.

The candle on my kitchen altar still glows from yesterday. The holy mother stares at me while I do the dishes. Her face knows great pain and sadness. May she hold these mothers close to her bosom, may she come to them in their deepest dark, may she grant them comfort and peace. amen

for jarrett’s mom