on being seen…

August 13, 2010

I took this picture of myself this morning, right at the last second before I snapped all my truth spilled out. I didn’t really intend to look, be so sad but there it was…*sigh* I have been painfully aware this week of how all my issues have held me and my work back this week, held me from taking kindness to places I really want to follow it to. It isn’t the whole story but that part feels really big at the moment.

Call it self protection, fear of failure, but being seen, really seen for all I have and haven’t done, all I am and am not, is something I’ve struggled with for a really long time. Even this blog was intentionally hard to find, I’ve been hiding in some ways I guess. The lesson doesn’t seem to be going away no matter how much I wish it would. So I’m taking the baby steps…pushing myself, just a little, to be okay and open being all the things…to claiming my work and power, yet still carry a fragile, kind of screwed up heart.

One Response to “on being seen…”

  1. […] The kind I am looking down into even my own self doubt. […]

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